Yesterday Matthew(11) wanted to make some muffins from scratch.  He’s shown himself to be pretty competent in the kitchen so I printed him out a recipe and he got started mixing flour and sugar as I ran out the door on a last minute errand.  Kait was here to supervise and answer any questions so I felt fine leaving the house for a half hour.

Everything was find.  I got no emergency texts saying the house was on fire or anything even though I probably should have because they freaking set the house on fire while I was gone.

Okay, not the house, exactly, but the oven.  They set the oven on fire.

Matthew.  My precious, bright eyed baby boy.

He mistook 3/4 cup sugar for 3 cups sugar.  But this wasn’t the issue.  The issue was the 3 tablespoons of baking powder.  The recipe called for  3 teaspoons baking powder.

I walked in the door and could smell the distinct odor of burnt cookies.  Kait told me that there had been a fire in the oven and somebody, I think it was Ben, commented thankfully we were able to save the muffins.

muffinsgonewrong

They started eating the custard-like mess from the bottom of the muffin cups.  I guess it wasn’t a total waste.

Lucy(4) was so disappointed about the lack of actual muffins though.  This morning while she was peeling an orange she requested out of the blue, Mom, please don’t let Matthew use too much baking powder today when he makes pupcakes again.

It struck me odd that she recalled it being too much baking powder in the muffins that ruined them.  That girl has got some kind of memory for sure.

Matthew saw me writing this post and said he was going to go attempt to make muffins again.  I will not be running any errands.  As a matter of fact, I should probably get off this computer so I can pay closer attention.

 

 

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Filed under: Matthewrecipes

I have no explanation for our conversations.

Kait texted me the other night. From her room. It just happened to be her 20th birthday but that doesn’t have anything to do with this post except hello I have a 20 year old child people and when did this happen?    Kait and I texting each other in the evenings from inside the same house has become a normal occurrence because since Christmas it has become hazardous to walk across the living room, kitchen, and dining room floors at night.  There are at least a hundred tiny dinosaurs and sea creatures everywhere no matter how much we try to clean them up and they are very bitey.

Kait: What is my blood type?

Me: I don’t know.  Why?

Kait: Trying to get some extra income.  Selling it on the back market.

Me: I don’t think that is going to work like you think it is.  You could just do your taxes and get your refund.

Kait: Obviously you never knew about the opportunities here.  Pensacola has some renowned black market gang mobs.

Me: Gang mobs spill blood, not buy blood.

Kait: Where do you think they get the blood to spill?  Trees don’t grow blood.

Me:

bloodtree

Blood. Tree.

It’s actually a Dragon Blood Tree but she didn’t specify so neither did I.

Cool tree though, right?

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Filed under: Kait

So many questions were answered for me.

And here we have a conversation between my second oldest and my second youngest.

Lucy (3): Joe, I need a herring so I can go cut down a tree in the backyard.

Joe (16): I don’t know what a herring looks like.  You’ll have to draw one for me.

Lucy: Well, I could draw it on paper if I had some chopsticks but we don’t have any chopsticks so you will have to get me some and then I can draw a herring for you.

Lucy’s (eyes suddenly very big):  OOOORRRRR   I could draw the herring with a crayon or a pencil!

She ran away and returned with a sheet of white paper and an orange crayon and then drew something that doesn’t resemble anything that exists anywhere.

Lucy: Wait, that doesn’t look like anything. Hmmm… I’ll fix it.

She added some eyes.

Lucy:  There. Now it’s a scary ghost.

Lucy:  Joe, I can’t draw a herring.  I need help.

Joe took the crayon and drew a simple picture of a fish.

Lucy:   That doesn’t really look like a herring.  It needs legs.

Joe drew some legs on it.

Lucy (laughing): Jooooeeee, that doesn’t look like a herring, it looks like a guy. He needs wings.

Joe:….

Lucy: Wait, noooo not wings.  I was thinking of an astronaut.  It needs wheels.

So, without further ado I give you a herring that can chop down a tree.

lucysherring

You’re welcome.

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Filed under: Friends & FamilyFunnyJoeLucyUm...

Wallpaper is my nemesis.

We’ve lived in this house for about 10 months now and have finally gotten to a point where we are ready to tackle a few projects.  The house has been seriously taken care of so I figured our mini-remodels would go super smoothly.

Hahaha.

The first thing I wanted to do was paint the kitchen. Simple.  Easy.  Cheap.  Quick.  I really don’t like color yellow so my plan was to give it a quick coat of white paint just to get the kitchen remodel started.  Turns out, no.

As it would turn out, the bright yellow kitchen walls are actually painted wallpaper because, really, nothing can just be easy right?

house

So, Matthew(11) and I ripped the wallpaper down in about 2 days, which took with it some paint and pieces of drywall so now my quick painting job has turned into a some sort of construction project where I get to scrape and clean and putty and texture and I don’t even know how to do some of those things.

matthewwallpaper

Wallpaper, people.
Wallpaper.

 

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Filed under: I tried to do a projectMatthew

Did you see Seattle win yesterday?

image

Yesterday’s Seattle/Green Bay football game was the absolute best game I’ve ever seen.  Rabbit is a strong Seahawks fan so there was a range of emotion in our living room as his home team scored 15 points in just 44 seconds, closing a 13 point gap and taking the lead with just 1:25 left in the 4th quarter.

I’m a Patriots fan myself, being born less than a hours drive from Gillette Stadium, and was happy to see them shut down the Colts hard yesterday.  However, that game was a total bore compared to the dramatic last 4 minutes of the Seahawk’s game.

With our two teams both now headed to the Superbowl in two weeks, that Sunday afternoon is going to be interesting in this house for sure.

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Filed under: fancy foosballUncategorized

Jesse is officially six.

Yesterday was Jesse’s birthday.  We got him a cake and I put some dinosaurs on it and you can see from the expression on his face that he was quite satisfied.

image

We also got him a small tablet, to which he replied very stoically, It’s a tablet. Yay. And then he proceeded to play with the $1 dinosaurs.

He’s easy to please for sure. 

I can’t believe my little chubby Jesse Wayne is so big.

image

Where does the time go?

image

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Filed under: Uncategorized

Deal alert!

I used an explanation point so you would know that this is for realz.

Rabbit and I found this at the Walmart yesterday.  It’s called Poo-Dough. It’s a revolutionary product that allows you to make your own poo for the low, low cost of just $7.96.

image

It looks just like the real thing.

If you’re like the tons of Americans who’ve been wanting to make their own poo you might want to hightail it to the Walmart and pick one up while they’re still available. 

Or, you know, you could just eat some food…

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Filed under: FunnyOnly at the WalmartUm...

Florida, you are drunk.

So, this is the screen shot of my Accu Weather app this just now.  And apparently it got even colder in the night.  This here is it starting to warm up.

image

I am more than a little disappointed in Florida right now and I am not sure if I should go ahead and get up or just call today an accident and go back to sleep until tomorrow.

I am supposed to be meeting a friend for coffee down at the Drowsy Poet in just a little bit so I guess I should get up even though my bed has a heated mattress pad and a really good pillow.

Becky: this is a statement of your worth right here.  There are not many people for whom I’d leave the house in this kind of freezing.

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Filed under: Uncategorized

PITCHA’S Y’ALL

I have some pictures for you guys. I put them into this sorta of video montage for your viewing pleasure. It was a pain get the pictures to match up with the music, which is still not as perfect as I would like but I did my best so you’re welcome.
Also, I don’t believe I’ve ever used the word montage before so that is new and exciting.

Full disclosure: One of the pictures was not from 2014, but 2015 instead. It somehow snuck it’s way in there and now the montage is pretty much a total lie and I’m sorry for deceiving you but I’m not fixing it right now so you should probably find a way to get over it.

I am hoping this 2014 wrap up makes up a little for the fact that I failed at posting much this past year.
Maybe I’ll do better this year.

Edit: I just published and watched this to make sure it was playing right and after the picture video is finished all 35 of our other videos started playing automatically like some sort of playlist or something. In case this happens to you as well I should apologize in advance if my family’s antics cause you to lose track of time and forget to move the laundry or something else important.

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Filed under: Friends & FamilySometimes we do stuff

My favorite present that Rabbit got me for Christmas is this 1980-something Polaroid camera.

mecamera

I didn’t have a Polaroid as a child but I had a friend who had one and seemed to always have an unlimited amount of instant film because she took pictures like it was digital.  I have, however, realized that Polaroid picture taking is definitely a very part-time hobby and not something I can just do whenever I feel.  The pictures run around $3 a piece so snapping them in succession is just not going to happen.

polaroid3

Many of you guys know that I am no good at taking pictures and, as it turns out, this simple Polaroid camera is no different.  I’ve gone through an entire box of film, 8 pictures, and have still not figured out how to work the little exposure slidey thingy.  The camera has only just the one function and I still can’t seem to get it right.  I bought 6 more boxes of the instant film with some Christmas money and as soon as they get here I’m going to set to work figuring out how to make the exposure thing work with me instead of against me.

I took some pictures of my Polaroids so you can see my progress because that’s not a bad idea at all.  Two negatives make a positive, right?

polaroid1

Or not…

polaroid2

Also, when I said “vintage photographer” in this post title I meant that the camera was old, not me.  I have 2 more months before I turn 40 and become vintage.  Besides, I feel like the Polaroid above of me holding Maggie makes me look really young.

 

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Filed under: Friends & FamilyI tried to do a project

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