Sometimes I feel like I’m living in a house full of children. It’s like there are little boys everywhere. And they’re getting into everything. And multiplying. And they smell funny.
Kinda like flies. Only I’m not leaving the door open. So I wonder how they keep getting in.
A friend of mine once said she kept them out by rubbing her door frames with bleach once a day. I tried it. It doesn’t work.
Recently, one of those little boys got in my house with a small fist full of pale pink mini roses.
Here Mom. I picked these for you!
Awww! How sweet. And thoughtful. And where did you get these from, young man?
So, here is where my conundrum lies.
Should I display these stolen roses? I could put the pretty little things in a small creamer pitcher and they’d be so cute, living out their final days providing glorious mini rose beauty. It would still mean death, but it would be a death with a purpose. A density, if you will. I mean destiny. But would that encourage Little Boy to maybe pick again?
Or I could just toss them out. But, the poor things. Not only did I let Little Boy get his grubby little hands all over you, but now I’m going to toss you into the compost bin and watch you rot a torturous death by biodegradation and enzyme acceleration. Mwa ha haha (that was my evil laugh - just so you know).
That sounded smart, right? But, really, I don’t know how compost works. I just know that I toss stuff into it and magically it disappears and then even more magically something better shows up in its place. It’s all pretty simple when you think about it that way.
Now, Claudia, the pretty pale pink mini rose bush owner, is one of the nicest people. Plus, she’s under the impression that young Mr. Flower Thief hung the moon. While she’d never want to see it become a habit, she’d be fine with the small handful of flowers missing from her bush.
Right now they’re on my counter top, dying slowly in a cute little creamer pitcher. Living out the destiny Little Boy created for them. I just couldn’t bring myself to toss them away. Plus, Little Boy is fairly compliant. I’m not too worried about him taking this as a sign that it’s okay to start a florist business using Ms. Claudia’s small manicured garden.
Ohhh! Maybe my friend was saying the bleach thing on the door frame worked to help keep flies out of the house.
I wonder if that actually works.