Only at the Walmart Archives

When what to my wondering eyes should appear…

No, not a miniature sleigh. The world hasn’t gone that crazy yet but after shopping at the Walmart yesterday (and might I add that you should never take your 5 youngest kids to Walmart on the first of the month) and filling our two carts up with fruits, veggies, meats, and dairy because we’ve been taking eating a cleaner diet more seriously I stumbled upon these and completely ruined the healthy vibe my cart had going on.

Candy Corn, people.
Candy. Freaking. Corn.

Some of you people may think that Halloween is bad because of ghosts and goblins and the devil but no. What makes Halloween evil are these orange and yellow bad boys. If unicorn horns could produce nectar this is what it would taste like.

I accidentally opened them and poured them into the glass dish that sits empty all year long waiting for candy corn before I took a picture because I’m too eager.  A couple also accidentally fell into my mouth as I was pouring them.

I guess I had better step up my running since apparently it’s officially sugar season now.  I’m already late for my run this morning so I had better go.

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Walmart got awesomer and we all get $10. Kind of.

Our local Walmart has just started up the grocery pickup service. You order groceries online using a unbelievably easy order system, then you set up a time to pick them up.

Here is how pickup worked for me at my Pace, FL Walmart.
They called me within my hour window to tell me my groceries were ready. I drove to the pickup area and pulled into a designated spot. I called the number on the sign to let them know I had arrived and they brought my groceries out to me and loaded them into my car. They showed me my produce and asked if it was acceptable and let me know that they were out of stock on one thing and double checked that their substitution was okay with me.
They were unbelievably friendly and seemed genuinely happy to be helping me, despite that it was 95 degrees with close to 100% humidity outside at 1 in the afternoon.

Also, I was able to spend as much time as I wanted putting my order together, and I was even able to make changes up until 11:45 the night before pickup.

With all the stress of having a baby, and her cataracts surgeries, and my 15 year old now working almost full time even though he’s not got a license yet, and with football starting back up this week for 3 of my kids…
I really, really want this to be a success for Walmart so I need everybody to use this service.

If you use THIS LINK you’ll get $10 off your first order, and I’ll get $10 off my next order. Copy the code then push the start shopping button.  It’s a win/win for all of us.

Don’t think about it.  Just do it. You know we both could use that $10 off.

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Because, Jesus.

Christ surfing without a board is everything a Floridian would need.

The Walmart knows.

IMAG0137

And it’s a tank top. Bonus.

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Deal alert!

I used an explanation point so you would know that this is for realz.

Rabbit and I found this at the Walmart yesterday.  It’s called Poo-Dough. It’s a revolutionary product that allows you to make your own poo for the low, low cost of just $7.96.

image

It looks just like the real thing.

If you’re like the tons of Americans who’ve been wanting to make their own poo you might want to hightail it to the Walmart and pick one up while they’re still available. 

Or, you know, you could just eat some food…

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